The Temple

First of all, I would like you to know that this post is very special to me.  I have put a lot of thought into which experiences I should share, and which to keep personal. 
I want to write about this while it is fresh.  I will not however post this, until we have the pictures back because no amount of words no matter how carefully they are chosen can even come close to doing this event justice. (We have 1 picture right now, so that will have to do, until I get more.  I wanted to post now before too much more time passes.)

My Endowments:
I was able to go to the temple for the first time on the 11th of this month (May).  On the way to the temple it was so surreal to think that for years I had driven by the temple, but have not been able to go inside.  I have admired the perfection of the outside of the building and wondered what was on the inside.  To think that I was at that moment going to the temple to enter inside of it and experience the sacred atmosphere and ordinances found within felt like a dream. When I got inside, everything was so beautiful and reverent.  It was so humbling.  I felt so clumsy.
It was beautiful. 
During my first experience, since most everyone knows, people don’t really tell you too much about what is done exactly in the temple due to how sacred we hold those things, I didn’t know what to expect.  I wasn’t able to really pause much and ponder the things that I felt.  I was mostly just trying to soak up information.  I did notice how much the things I learned inside made perfect sense to me.  Almost like finding missing pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.
Seeing Matthew for the first time all dressed in white quite literally took my breath away.  I cannot describe the feeling of joy and peace.  It took every emotion that I thought I had experienced in life to a completely new level.  To hold his hand and look into his eyes in such a holy place was beyond words.  The joy was so strong, I couldn’t really even process it within myself.  All I could do was cry.
But the feeling that confirmed to me the truth and magnitude of what I had done didn’t come to me until a few days later.  I am the kind of person who likes to use logic to understand things.  I like to be able to measure things, and calculate.  Faith does not always come naturally to me.  My largest battle in this lifetime, is going to be learning to listen to my heart.  I pondered the experiences and information I received in the temple, and just couldn’t wrap my head around some things.  How does the human mind possibly comprehend “eternity”?  It wasn’t until I humbled myself enough to recognize that if given the opportunity to talk to an astrophysicist, I wouldn’t even be able to understand half of anything they were trying to teach me.  How could I ever understand the works of God without his help?  I prayed.  I was able to clear my mind in order to allow myself to get any kind of response.  And I did receive a witness of the truth I have been taught.  I want everyone to know that I believe that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is Christ’s ancient church restored.  I believe it with all my heart.  I believe the Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ.  I believe the Bible is the word of God, and I believe that you cannot possibly fully understand the gospel of Jesus Christ without studying them both together.  Both of them testify in the truth of the other.  I believe that Joseph Smith was foreordained to rebuild Christ’s church after the order of His church while He lived on this Earth, for the last days. And I have faith in everything I learned and experienced in the House of the Lord.  I do not have a perfect knowledge of these things. I have not been able to see Christ face to face.  But when I combine the indescribable feeling I receive when I learn a truth that is new to me, or am reminded of one I had once learned, and the small unexplainable miracles that happen to our family on a daily basis, and when Matt and I receive everything that is promised to us when we obey certain commandments, that is all the evidence I need.  When I recognize God’s hand in all of these things, it satisfies my need to calculate and measure.  I am able to come to the conclusion in my heart as well as my mind that Christ lives.
It was amazing to see all of the people who came there to share the experience.  Never in my wildest dreams did I think so many people, non-relatives included, would decide to take their Friday night to come and support me and share their love and company. Quite a few of them had just heard one way or another about my exciting day and decided to join us. I didn’t EVER expect to see a lot of the people who ended up coming!  I am so blessed to have so many friends and family members who love and care about me, and for the ones that may be reading this; Thank you!

The Sealing:

(Can you tell I'd been crying... and crying... and crying? lol)

The Sealing took place on Friday, May 18th. The single most wonderful day of both mine and Matt’s lives.  We were able to take our 4 children with us into the temple and have them sealed to us for time and all eternity.  I cannot tell you how many bricks have been lifted off of our shoulders.  For our 8 years of marriage, Matt and I haven’t always been active and because of that, at times we were able to put out of our minds the fact that we had not been sealed; and according to our beliefs, because of that we would not have been able to continue to be a family unit in the next life.  Since we had started going back to church, we were unable to ignore that fact any longer.  And we knew that we needed to get this done.
Seeing the temple in the daylight for the first time, it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life.  To see the sunlight streaming through the stained glass windows and shining on all the whiteness of the whiteness is breathtaking.
We walked into the sealing room to see our family and a few friends there to share our experience.   And then, when they opened the door to bring in our little angels; Thomas, Connor, Riley and Makayla entered the room all dressed in white.  The beauty of the temple combined with those sweet little faces with their blonde hair and crystal blue eyes smiling at everyone in the room, wearing their perfectly clean, white clothing, it was the most touching, special, spiritual thing I have ever witnessed.  I am here to tell you, that I have seen heaven. When they half ran, half walked over to Matt and I and wrapped their arms around us and looked up at us with their smiling faces, I doubt there was a dry eye in the room.  Makayla was asleep in her Grandmother’s arms.  Her Grandmother whom she is named after. She was also all in white. The temple workers had put her in a beautiful white dress and put a white bow in her hair.  She looked so peaceful.  The only word I can find that comes close to describing the experience is "Paradise”. I know of a surety, that even if we couldn’t see him, God was in that room with us that day, and the sealing that took place is valid and binding and it means that we will be a family for the rest of eternity if we are faithful and endure to the end.
The purpose of me sharing some of these extremely special and personal thoughts and feelings, is to not only for journaling purposes.  I see it as an opportunity to share my testimony of these special things.  I see it as a way to encourage others to come to the temple and create their own special, sacred experiences.  And also to extend hope to anyone who may be working toward this amazing goal.  It took Matt and I 8 years to finally get here. And it was worth every minute of the journey.  Keep working and do not give up!  Come when you are ready, and I promise that your experiences will be just as amazing and special as ours!